Friday, December 3, 2010

Tales from the East Village Continued

I’ve spoken a lot about Sally and Marissa in previous posts but I would be remised if I left out one very, very important element of our apartment: my roommate Maya. 
This is Maya:

Maya bakes things for me. In fact she has a baking blog that you should probably check out. Maya likes to laugh and do crafty things and go to shows and be Jewish and eventually aspires to save the world, hopefully with baked good. But there is another side of Maya, a side that comes out usually when she is very tired. During this time, I like to picture that the holes in the filter between Maya’s brain and mouth slowly but surely expand until they let comments slip through - comments that never should’ve been uttered.
At 1 a.m. the other day, one of these moments happened.
Maya: You know what I was thinking about today? That it would really suck if I broke both my legs.
Charlotte: ......
Maya: Don’t you think?
Charlotte: ......
Maya: Don’t you think?
Charlotte: Don’t I think what?
Maya: Don’t you think it would suck if I broke both my legs?
Charlotte: ...... (note: usually when I don’t justify these questions with an answer, she just laughs and lets it go.)
Maya: You would have to bathe me, you know?
Charlotte: I probably wouldn’t.
Maya: And feed me.
Charlotte: I’m pretty sure handicapped people feed themselves.
Maya: No, you’d have to bathe me and feed me and do everything for me.
Charlotte: No, I’m not doing any of this because you’re not breaking your legs.
Maya: Would you rather break both your arms or both your legs?
Charlotte: What IS this conversation?
Maya: Blind or deaf?
Charlotte: We’ve had this discussion before.
Maya: I don’t remember. So, blind or deaf?
Charlotte: Blind.
Maya: I would rather be deaf.
Charlotte: I know you would, because we’ve had this discussion before. 
Maya: Right-handed or left-handed?
Charlotte: ..........
Maya: ...........
Charlotte: Go to sleep.


  1. Dear lord. I'm weird. very very weird.

  2. but i like the picture :-)